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Why Strong Parenting is Important to the Happiness and Emotional Well Being of Your Child

Why Strong Parenting is Important to the Happiness and Emotional Well Being of Your Child

Child Refusing Vegetables© Beckyabell | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photoshttp://www.stockfreeimages.com/

We live in an age of enlightenment…or so they say. We definitely live in the information age. As for the age of enlightenment…that may not be so true.

Parenting is tough…no baby comes with an instruction manual and every child is unique.

However, too many parents seem to believe that children are fine without guidelines or moral teachings. They seem to think that with all the information available in the world – their children will just absorb everything that is out there and be equipped to sort it out all by themselves.

I would never be in favor of returning to the days of rulers across the knuckles but I have seen firsthand the effects of parents who don’t care sufficiently or provide adequate nurturing, teaching, and boundaries…and the effects of that type of parenting are neither good nor positive for a child’s health.

I believe that there is a natural order that is meant to be followed: which is that parents are the parents because they are the ones who are meant to be in charge of the household – not the children. If it were meant to be the other way around – I believe that God would have had children giving birth to parents.

I have dealt with two adopted children who have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). RAD is an emotional disorder caused when children are not nurtured or kept safe. (There is more to it but for now that explanation will have to suffice). My children have RAD because they experienced abandonment and neglect. However, a child does not have to be abandoned or neglected to experience the emotional fall out of RAD.

Just let a child “Rule the Roost” and let him/her know in no uncertain terms that they are in charge and you have created a potential candidate for RAD yourself.
Have you ever noticed that children who run their homes are angry children with blatant disrespect for everyone and everything around them? There is a reason. A child needs boundaries. The soul of a child inherently knows that their parents should be in charge and teaching them and setting the example, etc.  When no guidance or boundaries are established by parents, the child is left feeling scared, abandoned and unsafe – even if the parents are right there in their presence.

I had a therapist describe it something like this: “Who knew that when we were changing their diapers (of our emotionally healthy children) while they were screaming, and fighting us and hating it; when we didn’t let they have their way or climb where they wouldn’t be safe; when we didn’t let them steal a toy from another child – they knew we were communicating that we cared and that they were safe and that we were helping them to be emotionally well.”

So…if you want your children to be emotionally healthy – love them, snuggle them, give them strong boundaries, teach them morals and appropriate behavior, teach them to work and be a contributing member of your family, teach them to respect you , others and themselves and you will have a much greater chance of raising a happy,  emotionally healthy child.

What You Need to Know About Depression – Oblander Chiropractic

What You Need to Know About Depression – Oblander Chiropractic

I was once a person with depression. Not “just” the baby blues or a few months of feeling down and out – I had all out don’t-want-to-live anymore depression for about 5 years.

It is surviving those five years of my life that has been a major contributor to my passion to help others have health and wellness in their lives.

The dictionary defines depression as: A condition of general emotional dejection and withdrawal; sadness greater and more prolonged than that warranted by any objective reason.

My personal definition of depression is pain, anguish, torture, agony, grief, melancholy, and suffering, etc. which overshadows the life of an individual who has every reason to feel otherwise. Depression is the sponge that robs life of its joy and satisfaction while wreaking havoc with relationships, families, and the life of the depressed individual.

Most people think that depression is a mental illness – in the medical books that is how it is defined but I can tell you from personal experience that depression affects every area of health: mental, emotional, physical and spiritual. I can also tell you that for each of those headline-grabbing stories about those with “mental illnesses” gone haywire, there are millions of depression victims suffering silently who are of no danger to anyone but possibly themselves. Those millions only want to be well again.

My own experience with depression included allopathic (MD’s) treatment and alternative treatment.

My first experience was with MD’s. MD’s sought to mask my symptoms with medications. The egos of the doctors who treated me did not allow me, as the patient, to be a viable participant in my own treatment. Unfortunately, patients with mental illnesses are often judged incapable by health professionals of being able to have clear, coherent thoughts. My doctors may have thought I was “crazy” but even now – these many years later I believe that I knew my body and what my body was experiencing better than anybody and that I should have been considered an essential participant in my treatment. However, the issues I had with allopathic treatment went deeper than that. I have always believed in addressing the source of a problem. Therefore, I wanted to get to the root of what was causing my depression. Getting to the root of a health issue is not something a standard MD does. A standard MD looks at symptoms, makes a diagnosis, and whips out the prescription tablet. For me, masking symptoms was not an adequate solution.

My second experience was with chiropractors. They tested my blood, found that I was suffering from severe adrenal fatigue and that I was in need of other nutritional components. They recommended the appropriate herbal remedies. From there, they worked with me to get to the root of the other physical ailments that I was suffering from – believing that all of the ailments I was suffering from were related. Finally, they encouraged me to do stretching exercises, deep breathing, and to incorporate inspirational books and literature into my life on a daily basis. Their treatment included regular adjustments to make sure that my nervous system (and therefore my entire body) was working as optimally as it could.

Eventually, we were able to find that my depression was directly related to my 24/7 migraines. I had been suffering from migraines for almost 13 years by the time I first received chiropractic treatment. The chiropractors who treated me helped me find the cause of my headaches and then eliminate them. Once my pain levels were significantly reduced – my depression left.

The chiropractic treatment and nutritional therapy that I received was not a “magic pill” and my depression and migraine headaches were not remedied overnight. However, they were eliminated and, for me, finding  and removing the cause was a much better solution than masking symptoms for the rest of my life.

As a former sufferer of depression, I can tell you what depression was and what it wasn’t and what I have since seen in common among those I know who suffer with depression.

Depression, for me, was not a complete withdrawal from life. It was also not a choice. I could not choose to be better just because I wanted to be. Although learning to have a more positive mindset helped – it too was insufficient.  What depression was was the loss of the emotional coordination I had once had. I was no longer able to navigate the normal ups and downs of life with the same tenacity and flexibility I had once possessed. It was not unlike losing muscle control in a hand or a limb but in this case it was my emotional state that lost its coordination and control.

I also can tell you that just like any victim of an accident or illness – my need for love and support did not go away – instead, it became even more important.

There are several components that I believe link themselves to depression:

Inadequate Nutrition – I believe that the absence of adequate nutrition can be a huge contributor to depression. Good whole food supplements are wonderful but a diet rich in fruits, vegetables and whole grains is not just important to a healthy body – it is also important to healthy emotions.

  1. Health Issues – Physical health that struggles can and usually will affect emotional health. Again, what we eat is so important and so is exercise. Those endorphins that help us feel better when we do not have depression also help us feel better when we do. Chemical imbalance is a common culprit in depression. (Sometimes chemical imbalances can be caused by prescription drugs.)
  2. Lack of Proper Self-care – How we take care of ourselves and the expectations we place on ourselves is huge. I was personally guilty of too often burning the candlestick at both ends. I see many sufferers of depression who are guilty of the same thing. Our bodies are amazing in their ability to adapt and compensate. For those who push the limits relentlessly there often comes a time when their body decides to give them a warning that they need to slow down and take life a little easier. Depression is often that warning.
  3. Negative Self-talk – We all talk to ourselves. We all have self expectations. It is common for those who suffer from depression to have unrealistic expectations of themselves and to be especially hard on and/or demanding of themselves. We all need to be as kind to ourselves as we are to our best friend or sweetheart. It is important that we love ourselves.
  4. Lack of Spirituality – Spirituality or the ability to look to a higher source of power to assist us in life is incredibly important. When we believe that we can only rely upon ourselves or that it is us against the world – just that thought alone can be depressing. I found that spending time each day with inspirational literature and working to build my personal spirituality helped me immensely.
  5. Lack of Faith – The faith I am talking about here includes faith in ourselves, in our fellow man and in our creator. Believing in ourselves and in our ability to change, to improve and to create a meaningful life is incredibly important. Believing that we can heal and that life can improve is critical.

 I remember once having a conversation with a woman regarding my depression. Frustrated with my inability to function in a healthy and normal way, she accused me of choosing to be depressed. I can tell you that no one “chooses” to be depressed. However, I do believe that our lifestyle choices can greatly influence our propensity for depression. I also believe that our lifestyle and attitude choices greatly influence the type of health we will enjoy and how we will age. It would be wonderful if depression could become a thing of the past. In the meantime, I hope we will all do what we can to minimize its likelihood and to help those who are suffering!

Why the Concern About Infant Vaccination? Oblander Chiropractic

Why the Concern About Infant Vaccination? Oblander Chiropractic

I just had to share this article on Infant Vaccinations. The article comes from the Herbal Legacy website and is one of their most recent newsletter postings. In regards to vaccinations, there are numerous voices both pro and con which can make the cutting through the arguments and finding good information very difficult. In addition to this article, please keep in mind that a child’s nervous system is not fully developed until about the age of 24 months. Chiropractors are all about obtaining health by natural means but they are also about doing no harm. Within a few years, I suspect that true unbiased studies will back what chiropractors have supported all along…that vaccines have their place and time but they should not be a part of an infant’s “wellness” care. Please enjoy!:

Sponsored by The School of Natural Healing & Christopher Publications


June 6, 2012
 
Infant Vaccinations  -David Christopher MH

We all want to protect babies from disease! How this is accomplished is the dividing factor. We are all exposed to the modern medicine model, in school, through the media, from relatives, and even from churches. Seldom are the alternative voices heard. Let me first say that I believe exposing a healthy person to small amounts of disease is a good idea, it strengthens and prepares the immune system for possible outbreaks. I do not believe the current medical model does this safely or effectively.

We are born with immunity to many diseases, because of our species, population and individual environments. Diseases that might affect us are negated through passive immunity received through the placenta and then from breast milk. Our own immune system starts to develop after a few months, and then starts developing memory at six months and can stop relying on passive immunity from mother’s milk at weaning “around eighteen months”. This is common knowledge acquired in any anatomy text.
My main concern with vaccines is why do they inject them into babies? There is no immune memory till the child’s immune system develops in the time frame of 6 months to 18 months! No benefit, thousands of casualties. I am personally contacted by many women with children who were perfectly normal until these children received vaccines.
We can safely become immune to many diseases by being healthy and interacting in society. We gain this immunity by exposure to our first line of defense, the mucus lining our skin, especially in orifices. This barrier traps invaders exposing them to phagocyte immune cells which engulf them and then alert T-cells and B-cells which target and destroy all invaders. Then memory cells keep us ready for secondary assaults thus creating immunity. This is a lifetime protection.
Vaccines are injected past our natural defenses, and rarely offer immunity for more than a few years. Even though blood work shows active anti-bodies, it is no guarantee against invasion. As an example, many universities have strict admittance requirements to be fully vaccinated. Even with 100% compliance they have experienced disease epidemics in these “protected populations”, with fully vaccinated individuals, coming down with the disease.
I implore everyone to hear both sides of this issue before ever accepting another vaccination. The best alternative treaties on this subject is “Vaccines: Are They Really Safe and Effective” by Neil Miller. This easy read is a fully documented text and is available at Christopher Publications.

David Christopher is a Master Herbalist and the director of The School of Natural Healing. He also co-hosts the popular radio show “A Healthier You” and is a popular international teacher and lecturer. 

Why Your Self-Esteem is Important to Your Health

Why Your Self-Esteem is Important to Your Health

I often work as a weight loss and health coach with patients in our office. Working with our patients in this way has helped me understand something important about self-esteem. I have never believed that self-esteem comes from outside sources as much as it comes from within.

I believe that self-esteem is an accumulation of choices that we make every day of our lives. Whether we recognize it or not – each choice that we make, in regards to the type of person we choose to be, impacts not only who we are becoming but how we feel about ourselves.

I love the following quote by Stephen R. Covey: “Every human has four endowments- self awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom… The power to choose, to respond, to change.”

What I have been able to observe as I have worked with individuals make positive changes in their lives and in their health is that as they demonstrate to themselves that they can make and keep commitments with their selves – their belief in their worth, their strength, and their potential grows.

I believe that conscience is a major player in self-esteem. I suspect that many people struggle with their self-esteem because their choices, their actions, and their lives in general are not congruent with their beliefs. Self-esteem is developed over time based on the balance of decisions we make, the actions we take, the way we treat others, the standards we set and maintain in regards to our goals and aspirations, and the level of respect, integrity, compassion, and discipline we give and receive throughout life.

I remember one of the women I worked with coming into my office after being on a modified diet for only 3 weeks. Each of those weeks she had lost weight and better yet, each week she had been able to sense how much better she was feeling. There was a light in her eyes and a noticeable difference in how she carried herself. Never before had she believed in her ability to make and keep a commitment – in her words “I have always believed I had no will power”. Three short weeks had taught her differently.
So what influence does self-esteem have on health?

I believe that when we live in harmony with our conscience – we make better choices in regards to the foods we eat, the activities (such as daily exercise) we participate in, and how diligent we are about our overall health.

How Does Chiropractic Work?

How Does Chiropractic Work?

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I find it interesting when I hear people ask if subluxations can really affect a person’s health. Sometimes I have to bite my tongue because to me it seems so obvious. After all, when a spinal cord is severed….is the ability of the individual with that spinal cord still able to move and function like it did previous to the injury? I obtained the following information from www.mdguidelines.com:

If the spinal cord is damaged, additional complications from paraplegia or quadriplegia include pneumonia, recurring urinary infections, decubitus ulcers, nephrolithiasis, and osteoporosis.

Think about it! If an individual receives injury to their spine in the neck area – why would urinary infections, etc be affected? Because the spine is home to the body’s nervous system and impairment to ANY area of the nervous system has the ability to affect any area of the body that that nervous system supplies information to.

Millions of instructions flow from your brain, down the spinal cord, and out to every organ and tissue. Signals sent back to the brain confirm whether your body is working as it should. Improper motion or position of the moving bones of the spine may interfere with this vital exchange by irritating nearby nerves and the tissues they control.

Nerve interferences are most common along the spine.  Chiropractic adjustments (manipulation) are designed to help correct or reduce those interferences. Research confirms that interferences to the nervous system change the way the body functions. Therefore, when interferences are allowed to continue without correction – health issues can develop over time which might have otherwise been avoided if they had been corrected with timely chiropractic adjustments.

Since it is possible to have subluxations and not know it (like the early stages of tooth decay or even cancer) chiropractors believe it is a good idea to be checked regularly for subluxations and to have those subluxations corrected.

Chiropractors are trained to find the subluxations you are experiencing. They then can use various adjusting methods to correct the subluxations. Some doctors only use one method – I personally like to be treated by a chiropractor with more than one tool (adjusting method) in his doctor’s bag. Here, at Oblander Chiropractic, I love that Dr. Oblander uses a variety of adjusting techniques which is often determined by both the desires of the patient and what is seen by Dr. Oblander as the best way to correct the subluxations.

Chiropractic is a science, art and philosophy. It’s a scientific fact that your brain and nervous system control every cell, tissue and organ of your body.

Chiropractic works by reducing or eliminating subluxations (interferences). The methods employed by chiropractic work because the body is a self-healing organism that is controlled and regulated by your nervous system. Utilizing adjustments to remove interferences the nervous system is experiencing is like taking a 1930’s home electrical system and replacing it with a state of the art electrical system. The shorts and faulty wiring from the old system are remedied and “whole” home (body) runs better, is more solid! A healthy nervous system is key to optimum health!

If Health is Feeling Well…Then What About What We Don’t Feel?

If Health is Feeling Well…Then What About What We Don’t Feel?

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I was meeting with a client the other day. She was concerned about the future of her health. This particular client is overweight and has a family history of heart disease that seems to reveal itself in her family members at very young ages.  In my opinion, her concern is justified and she is smart to be making the effort to lose weight and learn healthier lifestyle habits.

But what is health? Is it just the absence of sickness? Personally, I think that defining health as feeling well is absurd. – especially given the fact that we cannot “feel” 80% of what is going on in our bodies. Ever known someone who has been diagnosed with a serious health issue such as cancer that felt fine prior to their diagnosis? I think we all have. Think about it…if we could feel everything happening in our bodies that contribute to eventual ill health such as arterial blockages, cancer, kidney stones, Alzheimer’s, etc. wouldn’t the world we live in look a lot different? Wouldn’t our concerns about developing health issues be a mute point – after all, we would “feel” whatever we needed to feel before it got out of hand.

According to Webster’s Dictionary, health is a state of optimum physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease. In other words, health is not how you feel but rather, if you are physically, mentally and socially functioning at your optimum potential.

I like that definition because it addresses whole health and the fact that we cannot “feel” so much of what is going on with our physical health.  I also like the fact that it embraces health from a more rounded perspective. We are the sum total of our mental, emotional, spiritual and physical well being.  In truth, we cannot ignore any aspect of our health without impacting the rest.